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Jerry Buddyweiser – No More!! Hmm…

25 Nov

HE CAME, HE SAW, HE was CONQUERED.
No. I am not talking about Julius Caesar here…But about our Jerry Buddy-weiser! πŸ˜‰

I am now feeling sad to say that, “He’s no longer amidst us”! May his soul rest in peace! Amen! πŸ™‚

Let me talk a few words about the one who aspired to be my roommate sans my wish and permission.
Knowingly or unknowingly, he had come into my room a month ago and tried hard to be a part of my life….The first time I saw him, he ran under my bed faster than a cheetah would…I didn’t mind his I-don’t-like-the-way-you-look run, but I distinctly remember having sprung up on my feet and up on the bed…yes, I was happy and excited beyond limits to get a new roomie!! πŸ˜‰

I named him Jerry…and though he was not considered one among us, he had no hard feelings and made the most of our absence in our flat. While my roommates and me share the flat, he made the kitchen and one of the bathrooms his own. Ofcourse, we wouldn’t use the bathroom in a stranger’s presence, for that matter in anybody’s presence…no way, and I bet he very well knew that fact…weirdo! πŸ˜€

Three weeks passed by and he grew bigger eating the leftovers of what we cooked…and sometimes he even ate the ingredients! It was ok if he shared the monthly grocery bill, but no…Jerry didn’t share saala…but he did eat, and ate till he bloated as if he had never heard about the zero-sized Bebo…I must confess, that our frequencies never matched – nor did the wavelengths!Β πŸ˜‰

The day before I went to Mangalore, I decided to treat him with food specially available for his kind in the market…Mortein Rat Cake…and kept two pieces of it…one in his kitchen and one in his bathroom. Both were untouched the next morning. He didn’t seem to have come…may be he was angry over the fact that I didn’t invite him or probably he had a booze party somewhere else. Hic! πŸ˜€

Last Wednesday when I returned, I asked my roomies as to what happened to those cakes…they said, “Probably Jerry ate that one, but we didn’t find him”!! I thought he ate it and had gone wandering…but I saw him the next day (Thursday) in his bathroom. He must have come along with me to Mangalore, I presumed. πŸ˜›

Sunday, I decided to treat him again. So took the second packet of cake, cut it into two halves and placed them in his two haunts…Today morning, I found the half kept under the kitchen sink all gone…so I went to check his bathroom…and what I saw, made me all sad…he was gone…not from his bathroom, but from our lives.

He had passed away, probably due to congestion in his wind pipe…one piece of cake per night was advisable, but our Jerry was a glutton. He was so late to realize that and sadly, Jerry is now “late” forever.
I jumped again, ran out all excited to wake up my sleeping roomie. When he blabbered something in his sleep, I just left him there. Left a note for him, asking him to take care of the final rites of our most recent roomie.

I came back home from office late in the evening and was devastated to see that the body of Jerry was still lying exactly where I saw him in the morning. He deserved much better. I took a deep breath and decided to give him what he deserved, a fitting burial in the garbage pile near my flat. But before that I needed to make his life with us memorable. So I took a photograph of the body his soul had left behind. πŸ™‚

So my dear friends, you can offer your condolences – flowers, candles, rat-cake, et al – at his PORTRAIT HERE!! πŸ™‚

Condolences in cheque and cash, can be addressed directly to my address – yes, I stay offline too. They will fund the non-profitable Jerry foundation, which is now set up for the welfare of his ever loving roommates! πŸ˜€

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11 Comments

Posted by on November 25, 2008 in I~do~such~things

 

Tags: , , , ,

11 responses to “Jerry Buddyweiser – No More!! Hmm…

  1. aparna

    November 25, 2008 at 9:53 am

    mouse wud hav thot ….ram ke banaaye gaye leftovers khaane se toh acha hai ki mai mar jaaoooo πŸ˜›

     
  2. Revs

    November 25, 2008 at 10:18 am

    May his soul Rest In peace!! 😦

     
  3. Jass

    November 25, 2008 at 1:20 pm

    Psst you have left an address for me to send you cheque or cash. πŸ˜›

     
  4. chriz

    November 25, 2008 at 1:42 pm

    if onnly i was around when he was alive… i have a buddy like him.. do you wanna conquer!?

     
  5. amrita

    November 25, 2008 at 10:58 pm

    a perfect condolence speech , i lament the great loss , please send me a piece of the mortien rat kill too.
    — in anticipation
    tormented .

     
  6. Sree

    November 26, 2008 at 12:58 am

    @ Aparna,

    Lolz…Haan haan…tumne khaake nahi dekha na?? Ek din chakke toh deklo! πŸ˜›
    Maine usko khud ka pakaya hua khana nahi diya, isiliye tadap ke margaya! πŸ˜‰
    Thanks buddy! πŸ˜€

    @ Revs,

    Haan haan…next janam mein woh tere ghar aaye! πŸ˜€
    Thanks buddy! πŸ˜€

    @ Jass,
    If you are planning to send cash/cheques…my address is…msg karta hoon!! πŸ˜€
    Thanks buddy! πŸ˜€

     
  7. Sree

    November 26, 2008 at 1:00 am

    @ Chriz…
    Arre bhai…am not Julius Caesar either!! πŸ˜›
    Nah…am happy with one conquest!! πŸ˜€
    Thanks buddy!! πŸ˜€

    @ Amrita,

    Arre…haan…you said u had the same problem na…koi baat nahi…I’ll courier you that one…nahi toh bus mera naam leke khana pakaake khiladena…dekhta hoon kaise bachega! πŸ˜‰
    Thanks buddy!! πŸ˜€

     
  8. amrita

    November 26, 2008 at 2:14 am

    lets name you ‘sree the ratkiller’ since ladykiller would be such a misnomer πŸ˜› πŸ˜›

     
  9. iselldreams

    November 26, 2008 at 2:20 am

    hahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahah
    hahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahahahhahahahahahaahaha

    btw he is really cute
    i gave him cake:P

     
  10. Sree

    November 26, 2008 at 8:51 am

    @ Amrita,

    😦
    You never know, I may do all that without a word put in here! πŸ˜‰

    @ Isd,

    Cute eh?? If you come to India, you are sure to get recruited by Maneka Gandhi (She’s the first lady when it comes to loving animals more than humans)!! πŸ˜€
    I thought you would send his roommates some moolah…recessions I know! Sigh! πŸ˜‰
    Thanks buddy! πŸ˜€

     
  11. shanthi

    October 31, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    i hope u dont becom a serial killer ..really worried abt ur roomies !!(if they also behave like jerry…hav they read this?)

    if u dont like jerry…god save the one who is gonna marry u
    …if she loses her job she will be exactly like jerry!!!…eating ur food and sharing no bills and using all the rooms…pl. dont kill her!…

     

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