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Daily Archives: July 20, 2009

Do I flirt? Hell no! ;)

I have been interrogated quite a few many times…by parents, friends – both guys and gals, policemen, watchmen, auto-drivers and even my maid…one common question they ask somewhere along the whole tete-e-tete is the very one about which I have no clue whatsoever. They all in some way or the other ask “Sree, Do you flirt?”! ๐Ÿ™„
Now as you know, Sree and Flirting are like Snow and the Sahara! ๐Ÿ˜›
I always end up trying to convince them with “Err…nooooo….nooooo…I don’t flirt…I…noooooo…nooo…flirt??…me??…I don’t…what?!!”…but to my bad luck, they end up not believing me. Hmmmph!!
As someone said, โ€œOne kind of flirtation, is to boast we never flirt.โ€….I didn’t know that though I did it all the while! ๐Ÿ˜›
Did you just say “I don’t believe you”? WTF!
This post is a result of these one-too-many enquiries….I decided to pick up a few lines and styles to flirt around…Ladies, in case you get to meet me…beware!!! :mrgreen:

The Bare Stare:
I was standing at the bus stand…waiting for the ever punctual 9:45pm AC bus to arrive which would take me to the Chennai Central (Railway station) on my way to Bangalore…Standing beside me was a girl who by her looks and luggage, seemed like an IT geek on her way to hometown, waiting for the same AC bus as I was. I looked at her with naked eyes (yes, I wasn’t wearing my spectacles…what else huh?)….she looked at me…our eyes met….
All of a sudden, out of nowhere, an aunty appeared – “Enna kanna…flirting-a?” (What son, flirting eh?) ๐Ÿ˜ˆ
I didn’t know what to say then…
Later as I searched googled, I learnt that I had to say like someone quoted – โ€œYeah I flirt, I’m not blind and I’m not dead!โ€ Sigh…if I had researched a little earlier! ๐Ÿ˜›

Well, for those unaware…Eye Contact happens to be the most used and simplest flirting technique…as someone winkingly said, eyes do speak! ๐Ÿ˜‰
But too much of staring is bad…especially if its just one sided! If you can’t understand what I mean, experience it! ๐Ÿ˜›

Some of the pick-up lines and my learnings which doesn’t work anymore:

1. “You remind me of my next girlfriend.”
Modern women, are like mystery…you never know if they are single, committed, engaged or married…and beauty of it all, is that they never tell…One needs to be careful when you use this liner…Best to be used against those women who have been referenced by a trustworthy referrer. ๐Ÿ˜€

2. “My friend wants to know if you think Iโ€™m hot”
This is a very dangerous flirt line…unless you have a friend who is equally crazy and supportive…one whom you haven’t betrayed at any point of time (till then)…Cos if the gal ends up to be foolish, she is bound to ask “Which friend?”…at that very moment, you’d need some (otherwise useless) body to point at… ๐Ÿ˜†

3. “If nothing lasts for ever, will you be my nothing?”
This is a tried and tested liner…never used to fail…until girls took offense at being referred to as “nothing”…Remember, they are anything but nothing! ๐Ÿ˜‰

4. “Baby, you must be a lighter cause you turn me on..”
Never use this on first meet, unless you wanna burn your fingers! A very bold flirt line…believe me, if she’s hot and angry she’d light you up…alive…hmm…

5. “I canโ€™t taste my lips, could you do it for me?”
This one’s very flirtatious of the lot…make sure no one’s around, especially the ones from her side…not even her pet…If she happens to be an dog lover, she’d say “my dog would do that on my behalf”….save yourself an embarrasment! ๐Ÿ˜›

6. “If you were a bullet, I would shoot myself to have you in me.”
This is a military flirt line…if the girl is a daughter of a Colonel, try this one…would work fine, unless she’s got the license to kill…High when it comes to risk…but gives a high kick! ๐Ÿ˜‰

7. “Feel my shirt. Does that feel like boyfriend material?”
This is a “tailor”ed flirt line….cheap, but one which definitely brings on a smile…if she agrees, you are damn lucky dog…if not, the max that can happen is her pushing you away with a “Chi…thuuu….poda”!! ๐Ÿ˜†

8. “Your parents must be bakers, cozโ€™ ur a cutie pie”
This is a cute one, agreed…but then if girl gets offended for calling her parents bakers, get ready to be baked like one loaf of a bread! ๐Ÿ˜‰

9. “Damn girl, u look so fineโ€ฆ.
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  Do u mind, being mine”
Poetic flirting…never fails…unless she’s a dead duck with cob-webbed feet….!! ๐Ÿ˜›

10. “I feel like Richard Gere, I’m standing next to you, you Pretty Woman.”
Romantic filmi flirting…make sure your gal has seen the movie you are using as a bait…else it would make no sense…Also be sure of the movie character you pick…imagine how it would be using this line, if Richard Gere was gay in the movie! ๐Ÿ˜›

Barney

The most disgusting and local pick-up line that I learnt here in Chennai is “Enna Solranga?”…crap…a neat lift of “Kya bolti tu?”! ๐Ÿ˜› Aamir Khan saying it to Rani Mukherji is one thing, while the local romeo using his own version is another! ๐Ÿ˜›

Chalo…so long…and ya, be good! ๐Ÿ˜‰
PS: All lines have been flicked off the internet….cos I don’t flirt! ๐Ÿ˜‰

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Posted by on July 20, 2009 in Imaginative Bakwaas, I~do~such~things

 

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