[Humor]~The Matrimonial Itinerary… ;)

24 Apr

There comes a stage in life where you feel that things have come to a standstill. Things don’t tend to go the way they are expected to, nor do they show any sign of taking the path you would have laid out in your mind for it to go.
To say it in one brutal manner – You are left stranded and alone!

Life is all rosy till you complete that 25th birthday of yours. You’d have finished your college and either lived through those fresh years of corporate life or just entered the grill, after you are done with your post-graduation. But the time you strike 25, you like it or not, life kick-starts what can be termed as your ‘Quarter Life Crisis’.

Parents become all alert, with respect to your marriage alliance. If their child is a girl, they feel they have already waited too long. They even curse themselves for being liberal all these years. The cobwebs are lifted off the horoscope they made of yours, a quarter century ago.

There is a smile on the face of the Xerox shop owner when he sees your dad approaching with your horoscope in hand, for it means good business to him.
“25 copies please?” your dad would request. Look at the confidence he has on your horoscope.
“Sir, if you order 50 copies I offer a 10% discount on the bill” informs the photocopy guy, dead sure that your dad would take the bait.
“Wokay I say, make it 50. You never know!” he succumbs to the sales pitch, thereby reassuring his faith & confidence in the position of your stars!

Mom is happy to see that Dad is very much enthusiastic about fixing your nuptial, for she has no clue about the discounted deal her husband has made compromising on the confidence he had on you and your stars. She rewards him for his hard work, let’s say, with a pippin’ hot coffee, if nothing else. πŸ˜‰

They then plan to post (e-mailing, is still new fashion!) a copy each in an enclosed envelope to their ‘Contacts’ – the ever-ready mama-mamis, the on-their-toe relatives and the friends-of-friends. This process goes on till they really (put you in a fix? πŸ˜› ) fix you with someone.

If your alliance is fixed before your 26th birthday, you are spared of all that is to come.
If not, eyebrows and fingers, both are raised at various factors and maybe even at you.

Apart from the rhetorical IIM-IIT-Onsite questions, personal questions start to pop up:
“Is something wrong with him/her??”
“Is he/she too healthy? Is he/she too thin??”
As time passes, questions give way for guesses:
“I think there’s something terrible awaiting as per his/her horoscope. The planets seem to be not in the right houses.”
“I feel he/she expects an alliance from an even more affluent family.”
Eventually, it comes to rumors:
“I heard the guy/gal has an affair with a college mate, and so is rejecting every proposal. I saw him/her hugging someone in a Facebook photo!”
“The guy’s family I heard is demanding too much/The gal says that she doesn’t want to stay with the in-laws post-marriage.”

Amidst all this, you silently celebrate your 27th birthday. πŸ˜€
Yet, it’s not over for you, for you are not spared. You are now ready to be auctioned online, in a matrimonial site. πŸ˜‰
More on this, next time.

PS: Based on what I’m seeing my ‘eligible’ friends experience over the last 2 years. It’s fun only when you are just an observer. πŸ˜‰


Posted by on April 24, 2012 in Humor


Tags: , , , , , , , ,

6 responses to “[Humor]~The Matrimonial Itinerary… ;)

  1. metherebel

    April 25, 2012 at 10:33 am

    As you said it it is only fun when you are the observer! Because it is nowhere close to fun when you are the scapegoat πŸ˜‰

    But on a serious note I would like to believe that it is just a passing phase πŸ™‚

  2. Sree

    May 6, 2012 at 11:56 am

    @metherebel, yeah I agree..not funny when you are scapegoat πŸ™‚ Thanks πŸ™‚

  3. cutestangel

    May 6, 2012 at 11:40 pm

    So well described and to the point.Parents will never stop worrying what ever age you are.

  4. Sree

    May 9, 2012 at 11:58 pm

    @cutestangel, thanks a lot πŸ™‚

  5. Dishit D

    May 10, 2012 at 7:58 pm

    //auctioned online, in a matrimonial site.// hehe πŸ™‚


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